“She’s different”, she said.  

That’s what my colleague said about me to another colleague just this week.  While I’m not one to crave being the center of attention in any way, one of my pet peeve is “copying”.  I don’t want to wear the latest trend if it doesn’t suit me, walk into the same room and have the same dress, nor do I want to live someone else’s white picket fence life. It’s not to say that I don’t do things that are similar to everyone else or at times desire things that others have. I have participated in many milestones that others engage in such as marriage, having a family etc… Aside from that I embrace authenticity and when I don’t have the courage to do it myself I look for it in others.  I’m tough on my students when they give me the same old generic answers and I try to challenge them to be their own person and not a replica of others.

In every area, people want to replicate and do the same and that is so counterproductive to living authentically and in harmony with who we really are supposed to be.  This is no exception in the world of fitness. Whether it’s the cross-fit phase, the intermittent fasting phase, belly wraps (or whatever they’re called), gluten diets and more. It seems like every group of females is always huddled over on the quest to achieve the best glutes and abs.  I don’t blame them. I’ve been on that quest too but usually in a social gathering you can see me eyeball roll and discreetly creep back and join the wolfpack instead because I’d rather talk about funny social stories or sex than the next diet trend. Flash forward 20 minutes later when I rejoin the group.  What are we talking about now? Collagen or something like that? Ughh abort! No offense to anyone out there truly but I’m just not interested in hearing a play by play about about everyone’s diet and trends including my own. “You do you”, as Sarah Knight says.  You do you and let me do me.

With age, I am learning the importance of doing what’s right for me and being authentic and of course trying not to compare. The key word in this phrase is “learning” as I haven’t mastered it myself yet.  It’s not because your best friend is the elastic queen that you have to take up yoga when you have no interest in folding yourself like a pretzel. You have to find what works for you and that might mean a whole lot of self-exploration.  I’d argue that one of the reasons diets fail is that we’re too focused on what worked for everyone else rather than what works for us. I’ve done it myself. Where I end up saving a thousand suggested fitness exercises and tricks only to have a countless slew of photos and videos, half of them contradicting each other and no time to do any of it. So I learned to stop and focus and learn what I like. What drives me? What motivates me? What works for me? My bodybuilding experience has allowed me to get to know myself on many levels right down to how I metabolize food (or not) Good old Sally might be able to sustain herself on her salad every day or the pretty little lean machines on Instagram that post themselves eating chocolate.  All it takes is for some of us to visually scan the box and we can swear our ass grew.

Recently, I was chatting with a beautiful friend who seemed to be belittling herself because she wasn’t bodybuilding and competing.  It’s as if she was diminishing everything she was already doing because she wasn’t in some competition. If the adults are doing and saying this imagine what our young girls are thinking and saying. You don’t have to be anyone other than who you want to and you need to learn to align yourself with who you are and truly want to be, not who you think you should be to please others or who others think you should be.  Never mind what others may be doing or saying.

I appreciate the many sources of inspiration that have come my way. They have motivated me and added great value and richness to my life. Many people have come into my life and inspired me and these have been some of the greatest little gifts that life has to offer. But there’s a difference between inspiration and replication.  In each experience that you encounter take the lessons that come your way and learn from it and turn it into your own. Be rare and take the road less traveled. Find your passions and what fuels you. Be a beacon of light to others and most of all remember to be authentic.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go and find some creative way to apply this before I stand there on a stage trying to demonstrate my own authenticity among all those booties!