“Do you compete?”, he asked.  I looked behind me as surely he couldn’t be speaking to me. “What?”, I asked.  “Do you compete?”, he repeated. “I wish”, I thought but answered, “No why?” and he proceeded to tell me that I was killing it. Of course when I repeated the comment to another gym bud, he was quick to think that the guy was trying to sweet talk or seduce me. I can assure you that wasn’t the case. My husband on the other hand groaned over his breakfast and gave me that look when he knows my mind is brewing up project ideas. The “here she goes again” look.

Regardless, the man’s comment could not have come at a better time given that I had also spent several months Insta-stalking my now coach and telling my at the time trainer that I needed more and wanted to step it up.

I love weight training. I love the strength required, the intensity, the power I feel. It really drives me and inspires me.  Having begun not too long after my maternity leave I enjoyed it more and more as months went by and really wanted to improve my overall strength and body composition over the last year. The gym and boxing became my sanctuary and two outlets where I was able to focus on myself for a small portion of the day. The solitude during training does not bother me either. I talk to others here and there when I want but am happy to be quiet and in my space doing my workouts. Space and quiet. Something I lack in every other part of my life.  I used to crave noise and silence used to drive me crazy. Now I embrace it because after many years of being a school teacher with a very challenging clientele I don’t have enough quiet and space. I don’t get to “shut off” often to the point it even affects how I sleep. Most days, my role is not even “teaching” but more of an interventionist as I respond to one crisis after another. Then I go home and have to nurture my family: be a wife and mother and juggle the home responsibilities with the “off hours” work that I bring back home. So space and quiet only happens at the gym at 5 am. I don’t have to nurture anyone but myself there.

Those moments where someone may say something to plant a seed in your mind is what it sometimes takes to give someone a little nudge in the right direction. To see past what they know they are capable of and seek what they want but may be held back by fear. So when the same dude asked me a second time about competing, I reflected on how to do what was best for me. What was best for me was to silence my internal chatter and send that new coach a message. I did just that and it was the best decision ever! I suggest you find what motivates you and make those best decisions for yourself too!